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July 10, 2003

Relocation After Divorce Proves To Be Thorny Issue

"Cookie Cutter" Approach Not the Answer, Says Texas Family Law Expert

(Dallas) For divorced couples, one of the most difficult post-divorce issues is relocation-when one parent, for whatever reason, moves away from the other parent, taking the children as well.

"Even the most amicable divorces can turn ugly when relocation is involved," says Mary Jo McCurley, the chair of the State Bar of Texas' Family Law Section and name partner in the Dallas family law boutique of McCurley, Orsinger, McCurley & Nelson, L.L.P. "Unfortunately for all concerned, there's rarely an outcome that makes everybody happy."

The rising number of relocation disputes is the result of the intersection of two trends: the rising divorce rate and an increasingly mobile American society. And, because relocations are often necessary for employment reasons, the question before the court is whether to deprive the custodial parent a livelihood or the non-custodial parent contact with his or her children, Ms. McCurley says.

In some cases, however, relocation is good for the children, Ms. McCurley says. "Particularly in families where there is a history of violence, or the divorce is highly contentious, removing the parents from frequent contact ends up benefiting the children, because they aren't as exposed to the parents' conflicts," she says.

To sensitize judges, parents, family lawyers and others in the family court system to the issues surrounding relocation, Ms. McCurley and the Family Law Section are producing a videotape featuring the children of divorce speaking about their families' relocations. The tape is tentatively scheduled for release in late 2003.

"There's something about hearing a child's voice that clarifies an issue," Ms. McCurley says. "I don't have any illusions that this tape will sprinkle magic fairy dust on the problem, but I do hope that it will make parents understand the long-term effects of their actions on their children. Even if it doesn't result in the family not moving, it will focus everybody involved on the children's best interests and make them bend over backward to allow their relationship with the non-custodial parent to thrive even after the move."

What's needed isn't "cookie cutter" approach that the courts can apply to all situations, Ms. McCurley says.

"Even when relocation is addressed in the divorce settlement, things can change," she says. "People remarry, economies nosedive, a parent can become ill. Any number of things can bring about relocation. I think we'd all like to see the courts, parents and lawyers treat this issue as delicately as possible, and on a case-by-case basis."

For more information about McCurley Orsinger, visit the firm's website at www.momn.com. For more information about the State Bar's Family Law Section, visit www.sbotfam.org.